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If you hate your body
you dont love God. |
Fear |
Therapy |
Spiritual Counsels |
Books |
About CSF
Introduction |
Enslavement |
Finding Freedom |
The Mistake of Self-punishment |
Reasons for Becoming a Nonsmoker |
Understanding Withdrawal Symptoms |
Stopping Smoking through Faith and Prayer |
Visualization and Prayer Technique |
Coping with Cravings
OST
SMOKERS started
smoking during a stage of
identity
formation in which they felt psychologically empty within themselvesthat
is, they lacked confidence, self-esteem, and love for and trust in Godand so
they wanted some way to make themselves feel accepted by the world around
them. For example, adolescents who resent
their parents hypocrisy and lack of
true love can get caught in the illusion that if
they start smoking then they, too, can be as powerful as the adults who mistreat
them.
Enslavement
The illusions surrounding the first
few cigarettes, however, have no more substance than a puff of smoke, because once
nicotine gets into your body, it enslaves you to a continuous need for it. Like a
deadly parasite, nicotine takes over your body so that you value this deadly chemical
more than anything else in life, more even than life itself. More even than God
Himself.
So there you are, one dark day, helpless and
cowering in a cold doorway, damp with rain, desperately sucking the illusion
of strength and power out of a reeking cigarette, thinking to yourself, in
your bleak emptiness, This is life? And all the while you
fear that, without smoking, life will be bleak and
empty.
Well, theres more to life
than slavery to illusions.
Now, no one can argue that simply
smoking one cigarette is a sin. Yet consider the following:
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Smoking pollutes
the environment with toxic smoke and poisons from millions and thousands
of millions of discarded cigarette butts. |
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Smoking offends your
neighbor with the stench of stale smoke that you carry on your body and with
the poison of second-hand smoke that you force your neighbor to breathe. |
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Smoking scandalizes
children with the bad example of a deadly habit. |
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Smoking afflicts
your own body, the Temple of the Holy Spirit,
with deadly poisons and life-threatening medical problems. |
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When you smoke a
cigarette to make yourself feel good, you reject divine
grace, the only source of goodness; thus you subordinate the
desire for holiness to the desire for
self-punishment. |
And so, knowing all of this,
and yet continuing to believe in cigarettes more than you
believe in Christ, is a big
mistake.
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How often were
you criticized and humiliated as a child by your parents? How often did you
then condemn yourself for being worthless and
inadequate? And how often do you reach for a cigarette out of unconscious
anger as a secret wish to carry out that
condemnation?
Isnt it time to
give yourself a break? |
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Finding Freedom
Many individuals become nonsmokers
every day without professional help and with only the desire to achieve their
goal of finding freedom from an overpowering—and, at its psychological and
spiritual core, self-destructive—habit. Despite the glamor attributed to it
by the tobacco, entertainment, and advertising industries, smoking does nothing
to enhance life and everything to pollute and defile it.
So, as you set
out to become a nonsmoker, you will discover two things: smoking involves
an addiction to nicotine, and it involves a pattern of habitual
behaviors.
1. |
For some
individuals, the the nicotine addiction can be overcome through “will power”
or prayer, while for other individuals nicotine patches or nicotine gum may
be of help. Also, see the section below about understanding withdrawal
symptoms. |
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2. |
Overcoming habitual behaviors
involves deliberate, repeated attempts to break old patterns—patterns that
make cigarettes seem like “old friends” whose absence causes life to feel
flat and empty.
There can be
many reasons, some completely outside your awareness, that keep you hanging
on to those old enemies in friends clothing. Some individuals, for
example, have such a profound
unconscious
sense of despair and self-loathing that smoking aptly serves a dark wish for
self-destruction. But by becoming a non-smoker you can reclaim the self-respect
that you have been throwing away up until now. |
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And remember—many persons who successfully
become nonsmokers will have had at least one setback, because “just one puff” easily
rekindles old patterns. So if you do fall back, don’t
punish yourself; instead, admit
to God that you made a mistake and pray for the courage and guidance to learn from
your mistakes.
The Mistake of
Self-punishment
The problem with self-condemnation
and self-punishment is that it usurps Gods wisdom, and, in doing that,
it pushes away Gods mercy. As long as
youre punishing yourself, you simply are denying any mercy that God
could show to you.
Believe, therefore, as your deepest
comfort—more even than the comfort of cigarettes—that God desires your salvation
and will forgive your mistakes if only you stop hating yourself and turn to Him
in love, asking Him to teach you the ways of holiness.
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It is the trick
of demons to tell you otherwise, however. They will say that you are a bad
person, that God hates you, and that there is no point in asking God for help.
If you believe these lies, your belief in them will make it impossible to free
yourself from self-punishment. |
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Reasons for Becoming
a Nonsmoker
Pray about why you want to be a nonsmoker.
Write down some of your most important reasons on a small card. Review these reasons
several times a day, especially when you’re tempted to reach for a cigarette. In
fact, tape a card to your cigarette pack. Below are some suggestions that you can
use or modify as you wish.
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My being a nonsmoker will
strengthen my heart, improve my breathing capacity, and bolster my circulatory
system. |
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My being a nonsmoker will
help lower my blood pressure. |
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My being a nonsmoker will
increase my immune response to colds, flu, and other diseases. |
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My being a nonsmoker will
help me cut down on drinking. |
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As a non-smoker I will have
more energy and be more productive in all that I do. |
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As a nonsmoker I will
breathe more easily and won’t have morning cough or phlegm. |
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As a nonsmoker, my senses
of smell and taste will improve. |
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As a nonsmoker I will be
more in command of my life. |
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As a non-smoker I will be
setting a good example for children. |
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As a nonsmoker I will be
part of an increasingly nonsmoking society. |
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My being a nonsmoker will
help protect the health of other persons from Environmental Tobacco Smoke
(ETS). |
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[And, for women who are or
may become pregnant:] My being a nonsmoker will help to protect my unborn baby
from (ETS) and will decrease the risk of spontaneous abortion
(miscarriage). |
Understanding
Withdrawal Symptoms
Smoking withdrawal symptoms include
cravings; tension, anxiety, irritability, and restlessness; numbness in arms and
legs; dizziness; coughing; and hunger.
Some symptoms are related specifically
to nicotine withdrawal, while other symptoms are the result of your body returning
to a healthy state and recovering from your habitual abuse of toxic cigarette smoke.
If you stop smoking by using nicotine patches or nicotine gum, you may not experience
all the symptoms described.
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You can stop a
craving by focusing your attention on
something else, such as prayer. Cravings usually last for only
a couple minutes, so an attention diversion need only be immediate and
consistent, not complicated. |
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Muscle
tension, anxiety, irritability, and restlessness can be reduced
through contemplative prayer or by using a relaxation technique as described
in the next section. |
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You may
feel tingling sensations or
numbness in your arms and legs. These sensations
usually indicate improved circulation taking place as a result of your body
experiencing freedom from the poisons in tobacco smoke. |
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You may at times feel
dizzy or lightheaded. These sensations
usually mean that more oxygen is getting into your brain now that the carbon
monoxide associated with smoking is no longer present. |
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Some individuals find themselves
coughing more after quitting smoking than
before. The reason for this is that the cilia that line the lungs are working
to clean out all the tars and other debris in your lungs. |
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Increased
hunger is a common withdrawal symptom. To avoid weight gain, it is
important to exercise regularly; drink 8 oz (250 ml) of water per hour, even if
you do not feel thirsty; and have plenty of low-fat foods available for snacks
and meals. |
Smoking Cessation
Through Faith and Prayer
If you are addicted to any substance,
you are declaring with your behavior that you love the addiction
more than you love God, and so you will fail to love God as Christ commanded
us: You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your
soul, and with all your mind (Matthew 22:37). But, if only you train
yourself, through faith and prayer, to desire
holiness more than you desire an addiction, any addiction can be
overcome.
Stopping smoking, therefore,
involves two things: overcoming the
addiction to nicotine, and overcoming
the habit of always reaching for a cigarette
(either as a behavioral reward or as a means to relieve anxiety)instead
of reaching out to God in prayer.
To overcome the addiction
to nicotine, you have three choices. You can gradually reduce the number
of cigarettes that you smoke. Or you can use nicotine patches to put nicotine
into your system (while you refrain from smoking) as you gradually reduce
the dosage of the patches. Or you can just quit cold
turkeynicotine withdrawal is unpleasant, but
short-lived.
To overcome the habit
of constantly reaching for a cigarette, it will be necessary to teach yourself
to act in new ways. This takes some conscious effort. The first step is to
recognize, as it is happening, the urge to reach for a cigarette; the second
step is to tell yourself to do something different. Some people will carry
around a cinnamon stick, for example, and put it in their mouth in place
of a cigarette.
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While you are making
all these changes, it can help greatly to use some sort of relaxation technique.
For more information about relaxation techniques, see my webpages called
Progressive Muscle Relaxation
and
Autogenics Training
on A Guide to Psychology and its Practice. A relaxation CD (true to the Catholic
faith) from the present website can help you experience relaxation as well.
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Moreover, the Catholic Church
offers a centuries-old form of relaxation and emotional support: prayer.
After all, what keeps you chained to your addiction?
Fear. Fear that life will be bleak and empty without
smoking. And what is the most effective way to overcome fear? To
loveto be filled with all the fullness of
God.
Accordingly, I offer below two
ways to use prayer to help you stop smoking. The first way is best practiced
at least two times a day (morning and night). The second way is a small card
that you can print and carry with you; whenever you feel the urge to smoke
a cigarette, pull out the card and say the prayer. By the time you have finished,
the craving for a cigarette will have dissipated.
Visualization
and Prayer Technique
In general, changing unwanted
behavior comprises three basic steps:
1. |
To know how ugly the behavior
is and how much damage it causes to yourself and to others. |
2. |
To regret the damage caused by
the behavior. |
3. |
To know the benefits of new and
different behavior. |
Note carefully, though, that
in trying to overcome an addiction you will
immediately encounter a frustrating paradox:
thinking about the negative consequences of an addiction
will only increase the desire for the addictive substance. So
why does this happen? Well, the psychological
defense at the core of any addiction is denial, so when contemplating
any negative idea (such as getting cancer from smoking), your mind will crave
the intense pleasure of the addiction as a way to override (i.e., deny) the
frightening idea.
Therefore, even though it is
important to know the negative consequences of the addiction, the fear
of those consequences in itself wont be nearly so much a motivation
for overcoming the addiction as will be the hope of positive changes.
Consequently, those positive changes need to be visualized very, very
clearly.
So here is how
to do it: practice the following procedure at least twice a day until you
no longer need it.
First,
enter a state of relaxation. Here, you can simply sit (or kneel)
and pray quietly. This is important because the next two steps (if done properly)
will arouse substantial anxiety, and you need to be able to reduce that anxiety
again.
Second,
create a negative mood state in which you visualize the harmful and disgusting
effects of the unwanted behavior. Instead of defending your
behaviorto yourself, to others, and to Godsee the smoking addiction
for what it is in all its gruesome reality. For example, smell the stench
of the smoke on your clothes and body; see the stains on your fingers and
teeth; notice your shortness of breath and coughing; visualize the poisons
coating your lungs and other internal organs. After the intense negativity
of this mood has been felt fully, reduce the anxiety with relaxation. Then
pray the Hail Mary.
Third,
contemplate how miserable and wretched your life will be if this behavior
does not change. For example, see yourself wheezing for breath
and dying of cancer. Imagine other persons around you encouraged in their
own addictions because of your negative influence.
Then, after the intense negativity of this mood has been felt fully, reduce
the anxiety with relaxation, and pray the Hail Mary
Now come the
most important steps.
Fourth,
create a positive mood state in which you visualize the beneficial effects
of new, healthy behavior. For example, see yourself as calm and
confident as a non-smoker, relaxed and able to concentrate, free of frustration
and tension, a positive influence on others. Remember here your reasons for
wanting to stop smoking. Use your relaxation technique to enjoy a peaceful
state of mind with a deep sense of hope for yourself and love for others.
Pray the Hail Mary.
Fifth,
reinforce your positive mood with positive statements of
validation. Repeat the statements several times. Create your own,
or select from the following examples.
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When I trust in You,
Lord, I do not need to soothe myself with cigarettes. Through Your grace,
I am no longer a slave to impulses and addiction. |
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Lord, when grounded
in prayer, I work calmly and confidently. Give me the grace to not let my
self-confidence be bothered by small mistakes. In You I can overcome all
obstacles with total confidence. |
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Give me the grace,
Lord, to respect my own body as a temple of the Holy Spirit and to present
myself to others with respect and dignity. |
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Give me the grace,
Lord, to remain calm, relaxed, and composed in any situation. |
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Lord, let Your calmness
and patience reflect through me to shine upon others as compassion and sensitive
understanding. |
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You, Lord, give me
an experience of peace and calm that cannot be threatened by anything outside
myself. I thank you, Lord; I refuse to be jealous or envious, and I wish
peace and good to all. |
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Lord, help me to
remember that in You there are no
good days or
bad days; there is only love. |
Sixth,
conclude with a prayerful closure to the
session. Recite the following
prayers:
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The Hail, Holy Queen (Salve
Regina).
HAIL,
holy Queen,
Mother of Mercy;
hail, our life, our sweetness, and our hope.
To thee do we cry,
poor banished children of Eve;
to thee do we send up our sighs,
mourning and weeping in this vale of tears.
Turn then, most gracious Advocate,
thine eyes of mercy towards us;
and after this our exile,
show unto us the blessed fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
O clement, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary.
V. Pray for us, O holy Mother of God.
R. That we may be made worthy of the promises
of Christ.
Amen. |
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The prayer to St. Michael the
Archangel.
SAINT
Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle;
be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil.
May God rebuke him, we humbly pray:
and do thou, O Prince of the heavenly host,
by the power of God,
cast into hell Satan and all the wicked spirits,
who roam through the world, seeking the ruin of souls.
Amen. |
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The following invocation, thrice
repeated:
V. Most Sacred Heart of Jesus,
R. Have mercy upon us. |
Coping With
Cravings
Copy the following prayer card,
and whenever you feel a craving for a cigarette, pull out the card and say
the prayers:
PRAYER FOR STOPPING
SMOKING
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O
MARY, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse
to thee. Through the grace of your purity, may this unclean habit cease. |
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FROM
the stench of smoke, the foul taste in my mouth, the stains on my hands and
teeth, pray for my release.
Hail Mary . . . |
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FROM
coughing and phlegm, from polluted blood, from heart and lung disease, pray
for my release.
Hail Mary . . . |
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FROM
habit and slavery, pray for my release.
Hail Mary . . . |
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FROM
tension, fear, and anxiety, pray for my release.
Hail Mary . . . |
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FOR
health and calm and peace, pray for me.
Hail Mary . . . |
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Pray for us, O holy
Mother of God, that, by Christ redeemed, we will choose to live in purity.
Amen. |
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Healing
|
Though
Demons
Gloat
|
Anger
&
Forgiveness
|
Falling
Families,
Fallen Children
|
Disasters
and
Trauma
|
Psychology
from the
Heart
|
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Psychological healing
in the Catholic mystic tradition |
True Christian
identity
in confronting
evil |
How to turn the
emotional wounds
of daily life into
psychological growth. |
The psychological
and
spiritual remedy
for our cultural
disintegration |
The Struggle for
Psychological
and Spiritual
Growth |
Collected texts
about the spiritual depth of
clinical psychology |
More information |
More information |
More information |
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