Psychological Healing
in the Roman Catholic Mystic Tradition

Questions and Answers

I am a lawyer and father of six. I am thus very occupied most of the time. I know being holy is for all the faithful and I strive to incorporate prayer and penance throughout my day, revolving around the Eucharist. My question is: Are the ascetical practices of St. John of the Cross, as you mention on your website, meant for all or only for the few religious who can devote their entire life to them? or for occasional periods in our life (e.g. lent, to overcome addictions, etc.)? Is it dangerous for an ordinary mortal like myself to try to scale this Mount? Is it even possible in a normal “lay” life?

 
hrist Himself told us what He requires of us:

	When the Pharisees heard that He had silenced the Sadducees, they gathered together, and one of them [a scholar of the law] tested Him by asking, “Teacher, which commandment in the law is the greatest?” He said to him, “You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and the first commandment. The second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. The whole law and the prophets depend on these two commandments.
	—Matthew 22:34–40

So what does it really mean, “You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind”? Can an “ordinary mortal” do this? How much is enough? Well, I can tell you what the Catholic mystics through the ages have said it takes: everything you have. That’s something anyone can afford.

Of course, as Saint Francis de Sales wrote, it would be “ridiculous, unorganized and intolerable” for “married people to be no more concerned than a Capuchin about increasing their income; or for a working man to spend his whole day in church like a religious.” Still, he explains,

	The bee collects honey from flowers in such a way as to do the least damage or destruction to them, and he leaves them whole, undamaged and fresh, just as he found them. True devotion does still better. Not only does it not injure any sort of calling or occupation, it even embellishes and enhances it.      Moreover, just as every sort of gem, cast in honey, becomes brighter and more sparkling, each according to its color, so each person becomes more acceptable and fitting in his own vocation when he sets his vocation in the context of devotion. Through devotion your family cares become more peaceful, mutual love between husband and wife becomes more sincere. . . .      Therefore, in whatever situations we happen to be, we can and we must aspire to the life of perfection.
	—From The Introduction to the Devout Life by Saint Francis de Sales, bishop Office of Readings, 24 January

And the need to aspire to a life of perfection is the whole point of my website. Catholic mysticism is simply a matter of living a humble and devout lifestyle so as to seek holiness in everything you do, letting nothing interfere with a life of constant prayer—not even family.

	If anyone comes to Me without hating [1] his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple.
	—Luke 14:26

Beyond that encouragement, I can offer you one final image in your own language that you might understand. When you say, “Is it dangerous for an ordinary mortal like myself to try to scale this Mount? Is it even possible in a normal ‘lay’ life?” you express a subtle doubt in a way that sounds as if you were arguing a case in court before a jury, with a preconceived answer already in your mind.

So imagine standing before Christ the Judge on the last day. You will have to stand in your own defense. If you walk into the court with humility and say, “My Lord, I can offer no defense. I have already given you everything I have—my occupation, my family, my entire life—and I have nothing left with which to defend myself,” Christ might just say, “That’s true. Case dismissed.” But, if you have hidden doubts, He might just say, “I don’t think so. Let’s hear what your Accuser has to say.” And there you will be, empty and broken, with a fool for an attorney, standing next to the opposing counsel: Satan himself. And Satan, a master psychologist, will trample all of your psychological excuses and defenses into the dirt. It won’t be pretty.

Therefore, if you can’t make room—and I mean real room, not just a small closet—for Christ in your busy life, then do you really think He will make room for you in the Kingdom of Heaven?

Now, there are some who will tell you that this answer lacks charity, and you can listen to them, if you want, as they tell you that a genuine Christian faith does not have to be lived 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. And you can follow them into purgatory where this ignorance will be burned out of them, or, even worse, into hell where their disdain for self-sacrifice will cause them eternal misery.

But, if you accept the fact that you—indeed, anyone—can and should ascend Mount Carmel, and if you make the sacrifices to make the climb, then you will discover the ineffable glory awaiting you at the summit.

 
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1. Hate as used here does not mean “to wish harm to.” Instead it means “to remove your emotional dependence on.”

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