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In Catholic
marriage which emphasizes procreation, what about an older couple creating
a holy union in marriage that includes a life of love in serving God together
in the Church but where sexual pleasure is still an obvious
consideration?
 ou ask a question that the
Catechism of the Catholic Church does not address
specifically. The
Catechism does say, in general, that fecundity “is a gift, an
end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful”
(§2366), and that “the fundamental task
of marriage and family is to be at the service of life”
(§1653). Note that this service is not just
about procreation; it also involves educating
children (§2367), so that through an
intelligent and realistic perception of the world children may grow to love
and serve the will of God.
So it would make sense that,
if a parent with young children were left widowed, a husband or wife to replace
the deceased spouse could serve to provide a generous and warm family context
in which to continue to educate the
children.
The sexual aspect of Holy Matrimony,
however, does refer specifically to procreation. Note clearly, though, that
the Catechism says only that all sexuality must be open to the
transmission of life (§2366), not that it
must result in procreation. This is why birth control which blocks
fertility in some way (as opposed to simply abstaining from intercourse),
and sexual contact of mere erotic pleasure (such as masturbation, same-sex
stimulation, and anal
sex [1])
are considered to be grave sins; all of these things are closed, not open,
to life transmission. By making narcissistic pleasure
their ultimate delight, these things lead you away from a holy, spiritual
path into a useless dead end, precluding any service to God.
So, in the end, the answer to
your question can come from answering another question. How exactly would
Holy Matrimony in such a context serve God? If the only purpose of matrimony
were to provide personal pleasure, then the sacrament wouldn’t result
in any service to God, would it? What, then, should such a couple do? Well,
consider that staying single under those conditions and pursuing an individual
or communal life of prayer and service to others in the greater family of
the Church might serve God far more than a “marriage” of
convenience.
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To be able to
endure feeling rejection and loneliness, to continue on in humility, and
not to think that you deserve far better is a real blessing, especially if
you can feel this way for the honor of God, and if you do so
willingly. |
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—Thomas à Kempis
The Imitation of Christ,
Bk 2, Ch 9: “Of Emptiness”
(Trans. by William Creasy) |
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1. In its deepest psychoanalytic sense, anal sex
represents a “worship” of putrefaction and death as a psychological
defense against the fear of death, and therefore it defiles any responsibility
to life itself.
What the
Catechism of the Catholic Church says:
1653 The
fruitfulness of conjugal love extends to the fruits of the moral, spiritual,
and supernatural life that parents hand on to their children by education.
Parents are the principal and first educators of their children. In this
sense the fundamental task of marriage and family is to be at the service
of life.
2366 Fecundity
is a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to
be fruitful. A child does not come from outside as something added on to
the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual
giving, as its fruit and fulfillment. So the Church, which is on the side
of life, teaches that it is necessary that each and every marriage act remain
ordered per se to the procreation of human life. This particular doctrine,
expounded on numerous occasions by the Magisterium, is based on the inseparable
connection, established by God, which man on his own initiative may not break,
between the unitive significance and the procreative significance which are
both inherent to the marriage act.
2367 Called
to give life, spouses share in the creative power and fatherhood of God.
Married couples should regard it as their proper mission to transmit human
life and to educate their children; they should realize that they are thereby
cooperating with the love of God the Creator and are, in a
certain sense, its interpreters. They will fulfill this duty with a sense
of human and Christian responsibility.
  
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