Psychological Healing
in the Roman Catholic Mystic Tradition

Obsessive-Compulsive
Disorder

 
Introduction | Unconscious Guilt | Healing Guilt through a Holy Lifestyle: Christian Cognitive-Behavioral Treatment, Understanding Emotional Hurt, and Desire for the Holy | Summary

 
N REGARD to the treatment of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), you have a profound choice to make. 

•	You can accept the secular atheistic premises of modern science [1] and surrender your body and soul to the belief that OCD is simply a matter of brain chemistry and therefore “something out of your control.”
•	Or, you can look to the psychological-spiritual core of the problem and do something about it.

Keep in mind here that secular science worships knowledge and control, but Christianity is a religion of mystery and love that can direct the use of science into understanding, rather than control.

Now, as I say on the page about depression and anxiety, we know from scientific research that the brain and the mind have a mutual influence on each other and that even though mental disorders may have a material cause in brain neurochemistry they can also have a final cause in psychological activity. Or, said in another way, psychological conflicts can lead to disruptions of brain chemistry, and resolving those conflicts with love and respect for the mystery of their meaning can return brain chemistry to normal.

  
Unconscious Guilt

In this regard, psychological research into early infant development has shown that experiences of rage, and subsequent feelings of guilt, happen to us all right from early infancy. Every parent will make mistakes in empathic bonding with a child, and every child will feel emotionally hurt by those mistakes and will crave the satisfaction of revenge: to hurt the other “as I have been hurt.”

Most children manage to work through this guilt intuitively and have no lasting problems from it. Some children, however, because of subtle, guilt-producing family dynamics, will grow up lacking a social structure of deep faith and trust in God’s mercy, and will feel so guilty about having this desire for revenge that they try to hide it from others—and from themselves. 

Therefore, both psychological theory and clinical practice lead us to the understanding that OCD, at its core, is a neurotic way of coping with feelings of guilt. It’s similar to Lady Macbeth, in Shakespeare’s play Macbeth, crying, “Out, damned spot!” as she tries compulsively to rub the stain of Duncan’s murder from her hands.^[2]

Now, unlike Lady Macbeth, you may not have actually killed someone, but the unconscious motive for your compulsive rituals can be found in obsessive thoughts or mental images of your wanting to hurt someone because he or she has injured you, insulted you, obstructed you, or hurt you in some other emotional, physical, or material way.

To someone untrained in the psychology of the unconscious, it may seem difficult to understand this logically, but whatever you are afraid of doing is what you unconsciously desire. Maybe you have to check the stove in endless repetition to make sure you have turned it off, because you’re afraid of starting a fire. Well, unconsciously, you probably desire to set the whole house on fire to get revenge for having been cheated by someone. Maybe you have to wash your hands in endless repetition because they feel unclean. Well, unconsciously, maybe you desire to use those hands to strangle someone who has abused you in some way. Maybe you have to avoid stepping on any cracks in the sidewalk lest your mother break her back. Well, unconsciously, maybe you desire your mother to break her back because she has been mean to you or critical of you in some way. And on and on it goes.

Most likely you don’t like to talk about these thoughts and fantasies, or the suppressed desire for revenge—perhaps going all the way back to infancy—that drives them, because you find them so repugnant that you want to neutralize them before they reach full conscious awareness.^[3]

In the OCD response to guilt, therefore, you attempt to keep your guilt secret and to resolve it through your own superstitious efforts. You create rituals, and you unconsciously make mistakes in carrying them out, and you feel guilty about it all. But it’s all an artificially created guilt, taken in controlled doses, that serves to hide the real guilt of your anger at persons who have hurt you somehow.

As such, this response to guilt is completely opposed to the Catholic sacrament of Reconciliation in which, through contrition, you openly confess your guilt in order to receive forgiveness and absolution from Christ himself, through the action of the Church, and through trust  you accept His unbounded mercy.

  
Healing Guilt through a Holy Lifestyle

For OCD treatment to be in harmony with Christianity, then, the treatment must not just suppress the symptoms, it must teach you to live a holy lifestyle purged of vindictive hostility. Rather than live in guilty fear about your fantasies, you can learn to face the anger behind the fantasies—and to nip it in the bud.

 
Christian Cognitive-Behavioral Treatment

In the current medical realm, expert consensus guidelines indicate that Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is the initial treatment choice for OCD.

The basis for all CBT treatment for OCD is a concept called Exposure and Response Prevention. This involves exposing yourself to what you fear, and then preventing the defensive OCD response. In plain English, this all comes down to forcing yourself to do what you fear to do (such as touch a door handle without immediately washing your hands) or forcing yourself not to do what you fear not to do (such as refrain from organizing your closet as a response to thoughts that someone will be harmed if you don’t organize your closet).

When done in the context of formal psychotherapy, this process usually entails in vivo exposure; that is, having the psychotherapist present with you—“holding your hand,” so to speak—as you encounter actual feared situations and force yourself to overcome old behaviors. So what can you do in the Christian self-help context? Well, as for encouragement, know that the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ is the Father of compassion and the God of all encouragement (2 Corinthians 1:3). And trust in God to hold your hand: Since my heart was embittered and my soul deeply wounded, I was stupid and could not understand; I was like a brute beast in your presence. Yet I am always with you; you take hold of my right hand. (Psalm 73:21-23).

Moreover, Christian CBT expands the basic CBT concept in three ways. The self-help applications of this are as follows:

1.	Thoughts and Behaviors Teach yourself the thoughts and behaviors that constitute a holy lifestyle. Follow the spiritual counsels on this website so as to turn your attention away from a corrupt social world and toward a life of prayer and faith and acts of service to others grounded in total trust in Christ.
2.	Overcoming Superstition Every time you feel the urge to perform a compulsive act, remind yourself that no one will die just because you do not perform a ritual. Trust in God that life is not based in superstition. When that inner OCD “voice” responds, “Come on, John. I’m only warning you for your own good. Be reasonable and go back and complete the ritual right now, or you’ll be sorry!” say what Christ Himself said when hearing something contrary to His mission: “Get behind Me, Satan! You are an obstacle to Me. You are thinking not as God does, but as human beings do” (Matthew 16:23).   Then recite Psalm 51 (Have mercy on me . . . ). You may end up saying that psalm 150 times a day, but amen, amen, I say to you that when said in true contrition for a compulsive act, rather than as a compulsive act, it’s far better than washing your hands 150 times a day.
3.	Sacramental Forgiveness Finally, keep a detailed record of the thoughts and mental images that trigger your compulsive behavior. At least once a week take that record of obsessive thoughts and mental images to church and and confess them out loud to a priest—to find real relief for your guilt. (Of course, be sure to let the priest know why you have that list—and why you’re doing all this—in the first place.)   The point here, then, is to realize that no matter how ugly your thoughts and fantasies may seem to you, they can be interpreted psychologically and forgiven sacramentally.

	Let the weak sinful soul have no fear to approach Me, for even if it had more sins than there are grains in the world, all would be drowned in the unmeasurable depths of My mercy. . . . My mercy is greater than your sins and those of the entire world. Who can measure the extent of My goodness? For you I descended from heaven to earth; for you I allowed myself to be nailed to the cross; for you I let My Sacred Heart be pierced with a lance, thus opening wide the source of mercy for you. Come, then, with trust, to draw graces from this fountain. I never reject a contrite heart. Your misery has disappeared in the depths of My mercy. Do not argue with Me about your wretchedness. You will give Me pleasure if you hand over to me all your troubles and griefs. I shall heap upon you the treasures of My grace.
	—told to St. Faustina by Jesus (Diary, 1059; 1485)

  
Understanding Emotional Hurt

Endeavor, therefore, to recognize anything—large or small—that someone does to irritate you or insult you. Notice the feeling and acknowledge what has been done; resist the defensive urge to push away these feelings and hide them from yourself. Then bear the hurt in perfect faith, patiently and quietly, with humility. Bear the pain just as Christ bore the cross, patiently and quietly in perfect faith, without vindictive resentment. Trusting that God will protect you in everything, you can return a blessing to any insult, and you can pray for those who hurt you.^[4]

 
Desire for the Holy

Note that the ability to pray for those who hurt you depends on your being able to distance yourself from a secular world that literally feeds upon hostility and disobedience—anger on anger, hatred on hatred, lawsuit on lawsuit, weapon on weapon, death on death—enslaving you to a subversive lust for anger and revenge.

The more that you are able to desire the holy, rather than desire physical, worldly pleasures, and the more that you can pray constantly, rather than fill your head with worldly entertainment, the more progress you will make in overcoming your unconscious slavery to anger and revenge, and the more progress you will make in overcoming your superstitious attempts to wash away your hidden anger.

AN EXAMPLE Transient thoughts (that is, fantasies) of hurting someone are actually very common—so common, in fact, that they could be called “normal” human responses to feeling irritated by someone.   For example, a mother holding her infant while standing at the edge of Niagara Falls could suddenly think of throwing the child into the water. Now, such a thought could be an unconscious reaction to the mother’s irritation at the responsibility of caring for her new child.   But does having the thought mean that the mother is actually in danger of carrying it out? Not at all. The thought, like any fantasy, is just the result of a juxtaposition of images in the moment—the water and the infant—that suggest the possibility that the infant could be thrown into the water.   So, if the mother were to interpret the fantasy, she could say to herself, “Ah, yes, a child is a lot of responsibility, isn’she? And, with Christ’s help and guidance, I can accept the task.”   But if the mother fears the fantasy, she can deceive herself into believing that the fantasy never occurred, and she can develop obsessive-compulsive defenses to protect herself from the guilt of feeling resentment toward her child. And so, later that night, she might feel the compulsive need to spend hours rearranging the clothes in her closet according to the most elaborate of rituals, to appease the nagging belief that if she doesn’t do it—and do it perfectly—her baby will die.

  
Summary

With practice, as you learn to live a genuine Catholic life—detached from the world, trusting totally in God, chaste in body and heart, free from all anger and desire for revenge—your ability to give a blessing for a hurt will mean that you have no ugly thoughts and fantasies to fear, and therefore no guilt to hide. And from then on, whenever any fantasies arise in your mind, you can see them not as ugly and fearful, but simply as warnings that someone has hurt you somehow. Then, knowing you’ve been hurt, and feeling the pain, you can forgive the person who hurt you, and you can turn to God in faith and prayer:

Notes

1. Note that the whole problem with science is that it is trapped within the box of sin, and, no matter how powerful its instruments, it simply cannot see outside the box.
 
2. William Shakespeare, Macbeth, Act V, Scene I.
 
3. In fact, some persons are so good at repressing these fantasies that they will claim—even to the point of vindictive anger—they don’t even have them. This is why OCD is a disorder particularly resistant to traditional treatment.
 
4. The sad thing for many children is that they lack any living example of trust in God because their parents really do not live a lifestyle of genuine trust in God. Despite what their parents might say with their lips, and despite all their novenas and devotions, the parents’ fundamental psychological attitude is more often than not governed by attachment to the secular ways of the social world around them. When the children look to their parents’ religion, they see only dry rituals and superstitions. The children are wounded by their parents’ hypocrisy. They resent it. They fear it. And they secretly hate their parents for denying them any experience of true faith. So when the children feel anxiety or fear because of their anger, they have nothing to protect them. Their obsessive thoughts feel like demons tormenting them. Because they don’t know how to call upon the name of God to defend them (see Psalm 91), they take matters into their own hands by creating their own compulsive rituals to neutralize their anger. It’s as if they unconsciously use psychological symptoms to “show” their parents that the family lacks any meaningful faith.